Wiser With Age

Tag: friends

  • In My Mother’s Words: Birds of a feather

    In My Mother’s Words: Birds of a feather


    A woman with short hair wearing red necklace.

    I’ve told you all how my mother always made sure we surrounded ourselves with good influences. Most of all, she always reminded us to be proud of the person we are and not to change for anyone. We’ve all heard the expression, “Birds of a feather flock together.†It’s kind of terrible but kind of true all at the same time. The Spanish version of this, which I always heard, is…

    Dime con quién andas, y te dire quién eres.

    (Tell me who you surround yourself with and I’ll tell you who you are.)

    This brings me to my best friend/amiga, Valerie. Valerie had her engagement party this past weekend. We truly believe we are the same person, and that we are both getting married. Her fiancé agrees. We’re old souls, pesada (lack sensitivity), intelligent and have the honor of being born to INCREDIBLE mothers.

    We enjoy having drag show brunch dates with our favorite gals. Afterward, we’ll go hang out at the Clevelander on South Beach. These are the type of people we are. We are these people because of the women who raised us. Women who are retired and enjoy life as if they’re in their 30s. They’re still in their prime.

    My mom was in Honduras for Christmas, and I went to Sandra’s (Valerie’s mom) house. I’m always welcomed with open arms. Valerie has embarrassingly inappropriate conversations with my mom. She’s told my little mom she’d like to stick her in her purse and just carry her around. There’s a confianza (familiarity) that I hadn’t experience prior to this friendship.

    These women gave up everything for their children. They raised us to be loyal, caring, supportive and accepting. We followed their example, and in turn, these children found each other and established a formidable friendship. A friendship where there is loyalty – we care, we’re supportive and accepting.

    As Valerie and I always say, “If you’re a bird, I’m a bird.â€

    Glad we all flock together, amigas!

    A woman with short hair wearing red necklace.Victoria Moll-Ramirez is a broadcast journalist based in Atlanta, GA. She is originally from Miami, FL and had the great fortune of being raised by the sassiest, spunkiest, wisest, most hysterical Honduran woman in the world. Victoria’s mother, Bélgica, is 60-years-old, resides in Little Havana (Miami) and enjoys a good margarita accompanied by a heartrending ranchera. Victoria blogs about her mom’s funny and wise sayings on, “In My Mother’s Words.â€

  • In My Mother’s Words: On being supportive

    In My Mother’s Words: On being supportive


    A woman with short hair wearing red necklace.

    My mom is a pusher. She has pushed through more things than one might assume her tiny stature was capable of. Having her as my example turned me into a pusher. But, sometimes you want to push for those you love, and it doesn’t really work.

    If I care for you, I’m loyal until the end, almost to a fault. If my best friend is getting married (she is), I’m jumping for joy. If my best friend is sad, I’m sad next to her. If someone hurts my best friend, I’m livid. REALLY livid. As one of my guy besties likes to call it, “crazy girlfriend status.â€

    As I get older, I’ve learned to listen to my mom and her words more. She’s always said to me:

             No sudes calentura ajena.

    (Don’t sweat other people’s heat)

    You can’t want things for people more than they want it for themselves. In the end, you may be doing more harm than good. You can make them feel insecure, or have them shut you out (been there, done that). Instead, I’m learning to put my support out there and sit back. Anyone who is wanting to have it knows it’s there.

    Besides, as a Florida girl, who wants to be sweating all the time? Gross.

    A woman with short hair wearing red necklace.Victoria Moll-Ramirez is a broadcast journalist based in Atlanta, GA. She is originally from Miami, FL and had the great fortune of being raised by the sassiest, spunkiest, wisest, most hysterical Honduran woman in the world. Victoria’s mother, Bélgica, is 60-years-old, resides in Little Havana (Miami) and enjoys a good margarita accompanied by a heartrending ranchera. Victoria blogs about her mom’s funny and wise sayings on, “In My Mother’s Words.â€

  • In My Mother’s Words: My (Grand)Mother’s advice on social circles

    In My Mother’s Words: My (Grand)Mother’s advice on social circles


    A woman with short hair wearing red necklace.
    Bélgica (left), Maria Victoria (center), Victoria (right)

    My mother always raised me to be very headstrong and independent (shocking, I know). She always made it a point to tell us to be ourselves and to surround ourselves with friends we could learn from. It’s funny, because I think she worries more about “el elemento” (the element/type of people) I hang out with now more than she did when I was a kid. We are all influenced by our friends. We all don’t treat each friend the same or act the same around them.

    I have four main girlfriends I refer to as my “faithful four.†Each one of them brings out the best in me in a different way. What all of my friends have in common is the fact they are all positive influences. Every parent strives to have their child surrounded by the best kind of people.

    My grandmother, Maria Victoria, is about 4’8 and a total spitfire. She is 90 and doesn’t skip a beat. She won’t hesitate to threaten you with a frying pan over your head if you get out of line. She even does it to my 74-year-old uncle! She takes no prisoners. Her advice to my mom regarding her social circles was:

    Anda con tontos y tonta serás. Anda con sabios y sabía serás.

    (Surround yourself with fools and a a fool you will become. Surround yourself with wisdom and you will become wise.)

    My grandmother doesn’t know how to read or write. However, despite her lack of schooling she is astute. She surrounded herself with the right people — people she could learn from. She has passed on these pearls of wisdom to my mom who in turn has passed them onto us. The older we get, the more we realize how right our moms were…for the most part.

    In the end, my momma didn’t raise no fool…neither did hers.

    A woman with short hair wearing red necklace.Victoria Moll-Ramirez is a broadcast journalist based in Atlanta, GA. She is originally from Miami, FL and had the great fortune of being raised by the sassiest, spunkiest, wisest, most hysterical Honduran woman in the world. Victoria’s mother, Bélgica, is 60-years-old, resides in Little Havana (Miami) and enjoys a good margarita accompanied by a heartrending ranchera. Victoria blogs about her mom’s funny and wise sayings on, “In My Mother’s Words.â€

  • In My Mother’s Words: On friendships

    In My Mother’s Words: On friendships


    A woman with short hair wearing red necklace.
    Victoria with her mom.

    Friends. Where would any of us be without our friends? They’re our shoulders to cry on, our favorite ones to laugh with, and some of the people who love us the most in this world. Some friendships are for a lifetime, and others just make cameo appearances for a chapter or two. Something my mother has always stressed is honesty and open communication. As she likes to say:

    “Cuentas claras conservan amistades.”

    (Not exactly translated: Proper accountability preserves friendships.)

    Basically, what this does is emphasize the need for transparency in a friendship. Always make sure things are in the clear, whether it be something that bothered you, or owing someone $5. People have falling outs over the most minimal to the most majorly horrific things. My friends laugh at me when I pay them back $2 and tell me I’m being ridiculous.

    My mother would’ve had a much more difficult time with us as children had it not been for her friends. It’s true that it takes a village to raise a child, and now I see that with my own friends. Not every friend is meant for the long haul, and that’s ok. Typically the ones that stay are the best ones to keep, and the ones who go were fun while they lasted. But, in the end, I always have my mom, and I couldn’t ask for a better friend than that.

    Besides, she’s funny and drinks like a champ!

    A woman with short hair wearing red necklace.Victoria Moll-Ramirez is a broadcast journalist based in Atlanta, GA. She is originally from Miami, FL and had the great fortune of being raised by the sassiest, spunkiest, wisest, most hysterical Honduran woman in the world. Victoria’s mother, Bélgica, is 60-years-old, resides in Little Havana (Miami) and enjoys a good margarita accompanied by a heartrending ranchera. Victoria blogs about her mom’s funny and wise sayings on, “In My Mother’s Words.â€